Friday, November 11, 2016

We are in this struggle together.

I've had a challenging week but I am feeling encouraged today. 
I am reminded that often God is most at work in the messiest times of our lives and in life. 
If only it was easy to love messiness ... 

Stuck in the middle

Have you ever had one of those moments (or days) when you are actually feeling pretty good and smart? Maybe you're frustrated with others for being too slow, in the way, or kind of out of it. Life is good for you, if not slightly frustrating.

And then it happens ...

The next minute your sitting with a friend and they are telling you about the challenges of production with the ABC engineering platform (huh?!), or you meet with your boss and he/she questions if you're sufficiently meeting the expectations of the evaluation committee (what?!) or any other multitude of experiences that makes you realize you don't even know what you don't know.

All of the sudden your world gets a lot bigger - and you feel a lot smaller.

I've had that happen a lot in my life. Enough that if I am starting to feel like I might have things together, it makes me nervous and I start to explore the unknown quadrants that I might be missing.

Maybe that's humility?

I've been humbled at times when I spend hours designing fancy fliers, writing complicated curriculum to be interrupted (ugh!) by someone who wants to meet. After chatting for a bit, I find out she wants to come to this program with fancy fliers and complex curriculum but she only has t-shirts and is afraid to come to church in a t-shirt.

My world just got bigger ... and I got smaller.

I have learned from these wake up calls and interruptions the irony of modern faith which challenges us. We seem to constantly be on a quest to "be better".  We want to weigh less, fit our skinny clothes, have less grey hair, a more toned midsection, whiter teeth, smoother skin ... and THEN ...

THEN we'll get our pictures taken, meet up with old friends, schedule a reunion, buy new clothes, go back to school, go to church ...

Yep, go to church.

That's the irony. We are trying to make ourselves look and feel better before we go to the place that has the power to transform us so that none of those things matter.

We will always be in the messy middle of life. We will always be between two jean sizes. Our teeth will always either lighter or darker yesterday than they are today. We are constantly changing. Hopefully we are smarter and more compassionate today than we were yesterday. And if we feel less so, maybe our world grew larger?

Any way you look at, we are always in the middle. We are in the middle, together.

You are perfect in your imperfection to a God who loves you for exactly who you are today and every day. Just as you are. You are more than enough for Him. And it doesn't matter your jean size, what type of shirt you wear and how smart you are. He loves you, in the middle.

Monday, November 7, 2016

3 reasons kids love prayer - how to build meaningful connection into a busy week

Let me share a bit of secret with you ...  there is a rhythm of children's ministry program times. We share Bible stories in engaging ways that help kids to apply them to their everyday lives. There's a few minutes for worship singing and dancing that, I'll be honest, most often turns into a Congo line (we sometimes join in - kids know the best ways to celebrate and show God glory - and have fun in the process!).

But there's always the time consuming - therefore, must be well planned - all-time favorite element of PRAYER. Yes, your heard that correctly .. prayer.

Kids love prayer time. Here's a few reasons why ...

1. It validates their feelings. Ask your child what they'd like you to pray for. Chances are they have a few things on their mind. It can be big or little; it doesn't matter. God doesn't judge us for the size of our prayers nor should we feel the need to 'edit' or teach to their prayer requests. Just accept them where they are at. Your child might be more willing to share more of their thoughts, struggles or challenges in this open environment. Do whatever you can to support their concerns.

2. It shows them that their thoughts concerns are important enough to you that you are willing to share them with God. What a great way to tell your child "I'm on your side in life and we're in this together!" When you pray, ask for tools such as respect or responsibility to help you and your child to navigate the challenge. This will help them to learn to look for coping strategies when in these challenging situations.

3. It's time with YOU. There's a powerful video out there on YouTube that interviews parents and asks them, if they could have dinner with anyone, who it would be. Adults choose a great variety of powerful people who have had an amazing influence on the world.

When they ask that same question of the kids, their answers are very simple. Their favorite people to share dinner with are their own families. Sometimes it's a big extended family celebration dinner and sometimes it's just a simple, non-busy dinner with their small family. But the majority of the time its their very own family.

How to build in times of connection
If you've ever started working out after not doing it for a while (or at all!), you know how awkward it can be. Prayer can be the same at first. Give yourself permission to feel a little uncomfortable but remember why you are doing it. Dig deep, take a breath and begin ...

There's a few kinds of prayers that resonate with kids and come more naturally. I have found that, when kids are little, repetition prayers fit best with their spiritual levels. As they age, open-ended prayers are easier to incorporate.

At either dinner or bedtime, ask your child what their favorite/least favorite part of the day is during or maybe one thing for which you are thankful. Consider adding a prayer before you eat together or go to bed. It can be something that you say together or take turns leading. A simple go-to prayer for us is "God is great, God is good, help us do the things we should. Amen". The internet is a great resource for finding prayers that really connect with you family. Challenge older kids to search a favorite one to share with you or lead.

If it's new to your family, don't be discouraged if it doesn't catch on right away. I have a lot of kids that roll their eyes at me and make snide comments during prayer time to, just weeks later, seek me out with a really tough prayer request. Make a commitment to stick with it. And if you forget, start back when you remember. Don't beat yourself up about it. Ask your kids to help you remember. Start building patterns.

I'd love to hear from you ... what are ways that you build meaningful moments into your chaotic day?